Movie with Popcorns

These days I seem to prefer watching movies at home. Especially the desi movies. For all the desi movies I have watched seem to follow a few unwritten rules:

The theater may be half-empty, but irrespective of where you sit, the seat behind you will always get filled. If you are in the last row, someone will sit right next to you even if the rest of the theater is empty.

Movies are not supposed to be watched in silence. You should always do one of the following things while watching a movie -

(a) Ask your neighbor loudly what the actor just said.

(b) Give your companion a running translation of the movie, or your critique of every scene.

(c) Bring your children and have them construct alternate screenplays. You can have wide ranging discussions with your children on matters ranging from Bollywood to philosophy, and how things are not what they seem. But you should not talk loudly, you should whisper. Your stage whispers will carry right across the theater, but you are, you see, whispering.

(d) Wear copious quantities of some awful perfume, or hair oil. Eat garlic just before you step out of the house. Preferably don’t wash for a few days before the movie.

All these efforts on the part of my fellow movie-goers brings in a certain ambience. So I decided to watch movie at home

When I watch a movie at home, the screen is much smaller, the sound effects may just not be the same, and the audience will certainly not jeer or make catcalls. But the seats are much more comfortable, and I am in control – I can pause the movie to look again at a particular scene, or I can decrease the volume when it gets too loud. And no one behind me is going to tell me how it all ends.

But there’s something missing – the popcorn. I know there is always microwave popcorn, but you know it is not the real thing. It never pops perfectly, there are too many kernels, and the taste is just not the same as fresh popcorn.

Worse, microwave popcorn, it turns out.

So this weekend, I decided to make my own microwave popcorn. I did not start with growing my own corn, though I would have really liked to. But after detailed calculations, I realized that the amount of corn I needed could not be grown in flowerpots.

Here is how I went about doing it – I bought popcorn kernels that you can get in any supermarket. You even have a choice of white and yellow popcorn kernels, depending on how you like your popcorn to look.

Microwave Popcorn Recipe

Take the popcorn kernels in a bowl and add a spoon (or less) of butter or any vegetable oil of your choice to the kernels. Add salt to taste. If you like, add chilli powder or any curry powder of your choice. Mix it all up so every kernel is coated.

Pour the mixture into the brown paper bag. When I searched online, everyone assured me that I could staple the bag and it would be quite safe in the microwave. Apparently, since a staple is a really small piece of metal, it does not spark in the microwave.

But I played it safe and used a wooden toothpick to close the bag. I folded the edge of the bag once and then stuck the toothpick into it.

Now microwave this bag on high power for 3 to 5 minutes. You will know it’s done when the pops start getting really infrequent, say 5 seconds between pops.

Take the bag out and open it up away from your face (so you don’t get all the steam). Let it rest for a minute and once the steam has escaped, you can peer into the bag.

I am not, repeat not, responsible for any injuries that may result from whooping with joy, dancing around the kitchen, or trying to gobble down three mouthfuls of popcorn at a time.

I forgot to mention one other purchase you need to make – jeans two sizes too large. Believe me, once you have tried out this recipe, you will need them!